Ever wondered about the god-making process? Imagine having had few drinks in a first class restaurant and then Claudia Schiffer walks in. Few drinks may not be enough to reproduce a totally neolithic mind, but you could definitely see yourself building a temple to Demeter right there and then in the middle of Mayfair, had no one been looking (which, of course, renders Judaism, Christianity and Islam all the more unreasonable, if I may repeat myself).
If you think having the last word is fun, try having the last silence...
Fire was just the pretext. Prometheus' real gift to humanity was smoke...
I'm sorry for repeating something probably very widely known, but it is too good to leave out: "The French just don't have a word for entrepreneur" - G. W. Bush
"Is that thing genetically engineered and is going to be put down too?" asked the 6-year-old, while stuffing her face with handfuls of cheese and onion crisps.
About that global warming thing, where the Med was going to turn into Sahara and the Outer Hebrides into Cyclades, is there something else that we should know?
A heartfelt plea to American voters: kindly make sure that names on your voting ballots represent sentient beings. Being lead into war by a pretzel-waving primate is not good for my image.
The Atlantic is an imaginary ocean. It was invented to conceal entrance into the twilight zone.
The only rational approach to mythology is through the understanding of prevailing pedigrees and tribal movements constipatedly extracted from its misty, liquid substance. Any attempt to analyse it in terms of male vs female struggle for supremacy is a very smelly and stinky pile of shit excreted by the 20th century misanthropy. We all know who is behind all this: his name begins with F and it is a 5-letter word...
Anti-semitism is PC's last taboo. Patiently awaiting its death, so that we can burn the bible together with all its Apokrypha, Pseudo and whatnot, or (in the name of bloody tolerance) shelve it under Would-have-been-better-without-it Incunabula with a health warning: "This thing spawned Jesus and then Muhhamed - go and grow up instead of browsing in this area".
Too much contact with alien sexualities is detrimental to one's sanity.
Athens is a ridiculously old, chipped and filthy toilet, patiently awaiting to have the cistern replaced
Central London on a Friday night is a gas chamber without the gas and the chamber. The effect is the same. Tragic death through suffocation. With the right drugs administered at regular intervals the whole thing may seem like a big night out in the Metropolis of Europe .
Suburbia in all countries must die a quick but horrible death and take its milliards of dead souls with it.
Still haven't sussed out love after passion's gone. It's a liver spot, isn't it?
